Are you confused why life in the post-"fiscal cliff" era seems eerily similar (and equally unstable) to the pre-"fiscal cliff" era? Perhaps that's because nothing has really changed! We're unmistakably impoverished by $16.3 trillion dollars of National Debt, a continually increasing annual deficit, a stagnating job market, a stalled economy, a handful of protracted foreign military engagements, and a boat-full of unconstitutional federal entitlement programs. Hmmm... I'd say this illustrates national poverty. What do you say U.S. Goverment?
Why am I poor? Because I have no money. You see, if I had more money, then I wouldn't be poor. It's that simple. You get it? More money = not poor. No money = poor. Wow, I wasn't sure I could explain that any clearer. Now that you understand why I'm poor, listen to my plan for rising out of poverty. Are you listening? This will blow your mind. I'm going to get more money. Remember? More money = not poor!
How do I get more money, you ask. Simple. I make it or take it. Make money? Yes, make money. Take some rag, some toner, a sweet machine... print a couple bills and voila! I have money. Take money? Well, I command you to give me money. What for? For stuff. My stuff and your stuff... but mostly, my stuff. I'll probably give you "your stuff" at a pre-determined but nebulous date forty years from now. I digress. That's how I'm not poor. I make and take money... and now I'm not poor.
But let me be clear, I make and take the money. You must earn it. I make it and take it, while you earn it. Me = make it/take it. You = earn it.
If you become poor because you have no money, remember that you must earn it. Why can I just make it and take it while you have to earn it? Because I defy the economic gravity of insane financial policy. The ordinary laws of the land don't apply to extraordinary people like me. I'm an elected superhuman of the highest level of cephalized beings... independent of the consequences of my actions... answerable only to God (of whom, I'm not so sure I'm not Him).
As you can see, I'm obviously too smart to be talking about such intricate financial matters with you. Additionally, as you can further observe, I'm no longer poor. Actually, I've become instantly wealthy... wealthy with money (because I have so much of it, now)... and I cannot be associating with those that don't have money (no money = poor, remember). Poor people always want my money. That's indeed how they become "not poor"... they just need money. Oh gracious, you've already heard that explanation... we've come full circle so quickly. I flatter myself.
A brief sign-off to my poor and wealthy citizens: To the poor people, get some money... that's obviously why you're poor (I feel so sorry for you guys... vote for me and I'll hook you up with some stuff). To the wealthy people, you have earned too much money... I'm going to take it... JK/LOL... but seriously, I'm going to take your money. To all the people, I bet you wish you were so NOT poor like me... maybe one day you'll get on my level. #printMORbenjamins #fiscalElitist #pretentiousPsychosis
Secular progressives live in a make-believe world called, "Woodenitbenice." This world cannot exist in the realm of facts, truths and consequences. It is an alternate universe powered by emotional energy rather than fossil fuel.
ReplyDeleteWho wouldn't want to live there? Wouldn't it be nice if there were no guns, no war, no unwanted babies, no poor people, no rich people, no unwanted old people, no traffic congestion, etc.
Woodenitbenice sounds a lot like Heaven, but the secular progressives don't believe such a place exists. Why, because it can't be proven with.... facts. Go figure.